In the face of economic and policy changes that are rocking the philanthropic world, foundation leaders need to find new and innovative ways to motivate their board and staff. Part of this task is to help others within the organization to embrace change. One of the hardest aspects of a leader’s job is getting people to “follow”. Common sense says that the solutions are obvious…at least to the leader. Reality, however, is often different from our “common sense” solutions. How often have you thought:

• If only my board member would agree to talk with our mayor and Chamber of Commerce president about job creation, we could get more public support for our education initiative…
• If only our grantees were willing to merge their operations so that they can leverage their back office resources…
• If only my 10-year employee would be more invested in our work instead of doing the minimum and leaving at 4:00pm…

How do you overcome resistance to change? How do you stop seeing others as obstacles – they are just being stubborn, irrational, and unable to adapt to new ideas — and actually turn their resistance into a positive force for the results you want to achieve?

Peter Block, an author, consultant and active citizen in Cincinnati, Ohio, has spent his life exploring, writing and teaching about empowerment, stewardship, chosen accountability and the reconciliation of community. Early in my career I had the opportunity to work with Peter to deepen my understanding about:

• How individuals respond to change
• How to facilitate shared understanding and increase an organization’s ability to travel down the same path even though people may walk, jog, or even bicycle down parallel, perpendicular and curvy lanes that intersect in multiple places along the way.[BAD1]

The biggest lesson I learned from Peter is that it’s human nature to resist change. People naturally resist dealing with difficult realities that make them uncomfortable. None of us enjoy pain. All of us want to feel in control and don’t like being vulnerable to others. We want to feel that we have made a difference that our voice really matters, that others count on our expertise. Resistance occurs when we feel that we are going to lose control or that we may somehow jeopardize our political power in our circle of influence.

So, what does resistance look like? I’m sure you can think of times when you experienced something like…

1. Give me more detail: Asking for finer and finer bits of information. No [BAD2] matter how much information you share, it’s never enough.
2. Flood You with Detail: You ask a question and you get a 15-minute soliloquy outlining everything that happened since the beginning of the time.
3. Time: People are so busy that they just don’t have time to talk with you. Maybe after I’ve completed this huge deadline…
4. Impracticality: The “real world” isn’t ready for this kind of innovation.
5. Silence: This is the toughest resistance of all. Never believe that silence means consent. If you are dealing with something important, it’s not natural for a board member, grantee or employee to have no reaction.
6. Intellectualizing: Occurs when someone shifts the discussion from deciding how to proceed and starts exploring theory after theory about why things are the way that they are.
7. Moralizing: “Those people”, “they need to understand” “you should do…” are all phrases that indicate someone wants to talk about how things ought to be rather than how they are. Putting oneself on a pedestal of superiority indicates that the individual thinks he or she isn’t part of the problem.
8. Pressing for solutions: We all want solutions. But pushing for solutions too early keeps us from learning anything important about the nature of the problem. If we don’t truly understand the problem we want to resolve, then we can implement solutions that have nothing to do with the real nature of the problem.

This list is not all-inclusive but it does give you an idea about how challenging resistance can be to discern. How do you know when people have legitimate concerns and when they are expressing resistance?

Resistance only occurs when the concerns about facing the difficult realities and the choice not to deal with them are expressed indirectly. By blaming the lack of detailed data, not enough time or budget, lack of understanding by “those people”, or being silent, all of us can avoid implementing a new idea. Instead of saying, “No I don’t believe this is the best solution” (a direct, clear statement) resistance can include everything from the obvious such as intense questioning and criticism to more subtle behaviors such as changing the subject and giving one word answers to questions. Indirect expression of resistance is especially subtle in the South. Our “conspiracy of southern gentility” often makes it difficult to really understand others’ true viewpoint.

So, what do you do? You allow the resistance to spew forward like a storm, and not fight it head on. Feelings pass and change when they are expressed directly. Don’t fight the resistance. If you fight, argue or otherwise appear remotely antagonistic, the individual’s resistance will intensify and expand. Instead, encourage full expression of others’ concerns so that they can be diffused and addressed. The goal is to shift from indirect expression of concerns to direct statements of real issues and reservations. Once you know the true concerns, you can respond effectively.

Peter recommends three steps:

1. Identify what form the resistance is taking. Look for cues and then put some words to what you see happening.
   1. Trust what you see more than what you hear
   2. Listen to yourself. Are you uneasy, bored or irritated?
   3. Is the same idea explained to you for the third time? Are you answering the same question for the third time?

1. State, in a neutral tone of voice, the form the resistance is taking. In other words, NAME the resistance. The trick is using neutral, rather than blaming, language.
   1. Use everyday language. Think about how you would describe the behavior to a close friend.
   2. Be simple and direct.
   3. Put into words what you are feeling about the discussion.  Use “I statements”.

1. Be quiet. Listen. Let the other person respond to what you’ve said.
   1. Don’t take it personally.
   2. If someone is resistant, it usually means that you have touched something important and valuable.
   3. Most questions are statements in disguise. Listen for what isn’t being said.

Managing a foundation (or any organization) through times of change is rarely easy, but knowing how to recognize and deal with resistance certainly helps. For more information, I’d recommend Peter Block’s book, Stewardship: Choosing Service Over Self-Interest (1993). And remember, although it’s the downside of human nature that causes resistance, it’s the upside that is ultimately what makes philanthropy work.

-  Jennifer Bush

–Editor

Tips for dealing with kids who say, ‘I’m coming back’

Have you run into new leadership challenges due to globalization? Have you found that workers from different cultures require adding new perspectives and skills to your management toolbox? If so, Global leaders coaching-Coaching Across Culture, a paper written by Doudou Fall may be of interest to you.

This paper is about learning to understand and explore the different challenges and perspectives of coaching globally, as well as the strategy intended to face these challenges and be successful.

“Coaching Across Cultures” is also a summary of several articles, reading, extracts and literature searches by authors in management and strategy, as well as professionals with a specific knowledge of coaching within multiple cultures.

If you find that you are looking for some tips on adapting your leadership skills to be better prepared to deal with managing in situations with multiple cultures, then enjoy downloading “Coaching Across Cultures.”

****

Cody Benoit is a rising Sophomore at Elon University. He is a Isabella Cannon Leadership Fellow, as well as a member of Sigma Phi Epsilon and the Balanced Man Program. He is the Director of the Incoming Leadership Fellows for the Class of 2014, along with being a member of Lead Team and an Orientation Leader at his university.  Cody is currently serving as a  summer 2010 intern for TheCoachingAssociation.com.

Roads, Routes and Ruts: A Guidebook For Career Success

Joyce addresses the importance of identifying children’s strengths and active parental guidance during childhood development. She notes the need for balancing a child’s interests and outlook through new and different experiences. For college graduates, Joyce looks at the importance of understanding job market trends and the need to realize the possibilities these opportunities hold, rather than the limitations they may present. She examines the job search process including the development of a resume, researching prospective companies, improving interviewing techniques and the power of networking.

Joyce also discusses getting out of a rut through career enhancement and advancement techniques that include self evaluation, stress management, attitude adjustment, continuing education and networking. Other topics include preparing for corporate downsizing and layoffs, dealing with unemployment and the hidden job market. Roads, Routes, and Ruts is filled with tips and strategies that illustrate the author’s expertise on how to get a job, and how to change jobs.

$9.95 +shipping

Volume discounts are available for this publication. Call us at 336-288-1799 for more information.

Getting Your Kid Out Of The House And Into A Job

Finally, a straightforward guide for parents of adult children who are looking for jobs. Whether your child is 15 or 50, parents have a hard time knowing what role to play in their child’s search for work. Getting Your Kid Out of the House and Into a Job is a roadmap for parents…and there’s some pretty good advice for the kids too.

Paperback copies are available on Amazon for $19.95

OR in the Greensboro, NC Center for Creative Leadership Bookstore (call 336-288-7210 for hours of operation).

Click here for more information about the book

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For those of us in the executive coaching, leadership development, and business consulting realm, this is some wonderful and inspiring stuff!  The topical index for the site includes:

• Architecture/Planning
• Arts
• Biotechnology
• Defense/Military
• Economics
• Education
• Engineering
• Environment/Energy
• Exploration/Travel
• History
• Innovation/Invention
• International Affairs
• Business/Leadership
• Media
• Medicine
• MIT
• National Security
• Public Policy
• Science
• Technology

Browsing through the videos, I found several that caught my eye:

• Linda Mason, Chairman of the 1.3 billion dollar Bright Horizons enterprise talking about how she and her husband came to launch and build their business during a tough economic time.
• Timothy Brown, from IDEO talking about “Innovation through Design Thinking”
• “Innovation Leadership during Economic Crisis” by Emmanuel Maceda from Bain and Company

What a rich resource of learning for coaches and their clients.  I also saw Thomas Friedman, Bill Gates, and Barack Obama on the list of recorded lectures and presentations.

Here’s how the site describes itself and its mission:

“MIT World™ answers that question by publishing key presentations by the MIT faculty and guest speakers who are shaping the future. These free, on-demand videos, available 24/7 to viewers worldwide, reflect and extend MIT’s educational mission—to provide the best education in science, technology, and related fields—to engaged learners anytime, anywhere.

More a publication of thought leadership, and less a news site, MIT World aims to capture the pulse and excitement of the range of ideas discussed at MIT every day and share them with the world. A growing archive of more than 585 works offers insights on topics ranging from architecture to innovation to technology and sustainability. Cumulatively, these presentations by world-class thinkers and doers map great ideas in the making.”

So, when you need a little brain boost, check it out!